To help us think about this question based on Scripture, it is useful to divide it into three parts:
- Can we Christians pray for people who have already died? (Part 1)
- Can a person who has committed suicide go to heaven? (Part 2)
- How can I comfort people around me when someone they know has committed suicide? (Part 3)
Part 1: Can we Christians pray for people who have already died?
Prayer is talking to God. In prayer, our petitions ask God to use his power to take action for people. Whenever we Christians use the Lord’s Prayer, we say “your will be done.” We know that God is our Creator and we humans are his creatures, so our knowledge and ability cannot compare with his. His will is key for our origin, our present, and our future. And because of Jesus our Savior, we also know that God is good and that his will is good.
Thus, each time we pray in Jesus’ name, actually the concept of “your will be done” is implied in our petitions. Our heart of faith relies on our good God and his good plans. Our petitions come from this heart of faith, because we know God loves us on account of Jesus’ cross and is willing to hear us.
So, when we think about whether we can pray for people who have already died, it seems that we are really asking: what is God’s will and plan for people who have already died? Several parts of the Bible speak about this question.
One example is Hebrews 9:27 — “people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment.” God tells us that, once people die, they face his judgment. Then, the souls of people who die in faith are taken to the comfort of heaven (Luke 23:43; Acts 7:59; 2 Corinthians 5:8; Revelation 6:9-11), and the souls of people who die in unbelief are taken to the agony of the fire of hell (Luke 16:22-25). The Bible tells us that people cannot cross from hell to heaven or from heaven to hell (Luke 16:26). God says this plan (that unbelievers will perish, separated from the Lord and under his wrath, and believers will be with the Lord) is everlasting — forever (2 Thessalonians 1:9; 1 Thessalonians 4:17; John 3:16,36).
Because God has already told us his will — what he will do — regarding people who have already died, we do not need to ask God to take action for them. People who died in faith already enjoy the perfect comfort of heaven, so our prayers cannot improve this or make it last longer (God has said it will be forever). People who died in unbelief are already in the agony of the fire of hell, and our prayers cannot lessen this or make it shorter (God has said it will be forever).
This is a sobering message, but it reminds us how important it is to pray for other people while they are still living. Jesus died for the sin of the whole world, and God wants all people to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth (1 John 2:2; 1 Timothy 2:3-6). Likewise, it is important to use our time and money be friends to other people and preach the gospel to them while they are still living. God’s good plan is that people would become believers by hearing the word of Christ, and then we can rejoice with these fellow believers forever in heaven (Romans 10:14-17; Luke 16:9)!
Part 2: Can a person who has committed suicide go to heaven?
As we mentioned in Part 1, the Bible teaches that, when God judges people, he does this on the basis of whether or not, at the end of their life, they trust in Jesus as their Savior (John 5:24; Mark 16:16; Revelation 2:10). If the person who has committed suicide never claimed to be a member of a Christian church or a believer, then we do not have a reason to say that he or she was a believer and will be in heaven (although only God can see this person’s heart — 1 Samuel 16:7). This reminds us once more that, instead of waiting for some “perfect moment”, Christian love for others moves us to preach the gospel to them whenever we have the opportunity, whether in season or out of season (Ephesians 5:15-16; Colossians 4:4-5; 2 Timothy 4:2).
If the person who has committed suicide claimed to be a member of a Christian church or a believer, then we need to consider this question more.
The Bible tells us about six instances of suicide: a son of Gideon named Abimelek (Judges 9:50-56), King Saul (1 Samuel 31:1-4), the armor-bearer of King Saul (1 Samuel 31:5), the traitorous adivser Ahithophel (2 Samuel 15:12,30-37; 16:15-17:23), a king-killer who became the 7-day king of the northern kingdom, named Zimri (1 Kings 16:8-20), and Judas Iscariot (Matthew 27:3-5; Acts 1:25). Some people would also add Samson (Judges 16:21-31) to this list, but Samson’s death should not be seen as trying to take his life out of God’s hands (Psalm 31:15) and put in in his own hands. Instead, despite Samson’s many flaws, his death was a self-sacrificing act, similar to a soldier who knows that falling on an enemy grenade will likely kill him but still does so to protect his fellow soldiers. We can say this because Judges chapter 16 mentions Samson’s prayerful trust in the true God, and because he is mentioned in Hebrews chapter 11 among many other Old Testament people of faith (verse 32). However, this does not seem to be the case with the other six instances that we mentioned above. Although these six men were all part of the people of Israel, it seems that they acted out of unbelief and, if so, gave up the hope of heaven in the Messiah.
But even though all the examples of suicide that the Bible mentions are negative, this does not necessarily mean that every person who takes his or her own life will perish forever. It could be that a person was suffering from a pyschological disorder — like other parts of the body, the brain can also malfunction. Or it could be that in a person, in a moment of emotional crisis, lost control and committed suicide. We cannot say with certainty in each of these situations that this person did so out of unbelief. Ultimately, it is unbelief that condemns people to eternal punishment (2 Thessalonians 1:8-9; John 3:18), not some specific sin in and of itself. Please do not misunderstand: saying this does not deny the fact that committing suicide is disobedience to God’s will (Mark 7:21; 1 Peter 4:15) or that it brings tragic effects on survivors. (So, if you are thinking about suicide, please contact a trustworthy Christian to talk with you. The Lord sees your life as valuable in his eyes!) Instead, saying this simply distinguishes between sin and unbelief.
Because, finally, it is through faith in Jesus the Messiah that we are saved. This is not because we lived a good life, and it is not because we died a good death, but because Jesus lived perfectly in our place, died under the punishment that we had deserved, and then rose from the dead!
To help us think about the last question together.
Part 3: How can I comfort people around me when someone they know has committed suicide?
Many Christians have asked this question over the years. In essence, it is not much different from comforting people after any kind of death. People who have lost loved ones need our love and support. We Christians want to use whatever time and energy we can to stay with them, help them with tasks they need to do, talk with them (when they want to), and let them feel that we love them and support them. We Christians will pray continually that our merciful God will show mercy to their hurting hearts.
When we talk with people who are in mourning, we want to “speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15). If the person who died did not claim to believe in Jesus, we will avoid giving a kind of empty hope that God will certainly take this dead person to heaven. (After all, we do not want other people to think that our sins are not serious, that Jesus’ death on the cross was unnecessary, and that it does not matter whether or not they believe in him — Acts 4:12.) If the person who died claimed to believe in Jesus but then committed suicide, we will not pretend that we know what was in the heart of this person, because we ourselves cannot be certain. Instead, we will talk about what is certain: God’s Word (Psalm 33:4), God’s promises in Christ (2 Corinthians 1:20), and the strength he gives to us his people as we take refuge in him (Psalm 46).
Ultimately, this means that we need to talk with people about Jesus. Jesus is the one who has taken away our own sin and the sin of all our family and friends (John 1:29). Jesus is the one who has destroyed the power of death and has promised to raise us from the dead and give us eternal life with him (John 6:40,44; John 11:25-26; 1 Corinthians 15:55-57; 2 Timothy 1:10). Jesus is the one who lets us know God (John 1:18), and the one who reconciles us with him (Romans 5:10). To all who believe this, Jesus promises that he has gone to prepare a place for us, and he will come back to take us to be with him, that we also may be where he is (John 14:3).
Prayer:
Dear Lord Jesus, thank you for coming to this sinful earth for us. Because by your death and resurrection you took away the sting of death, we praise you! Because you have let us to hear your gospel and believe your promises, we thank you! We ask you to show compassion to the many people around us who have not yet heard or have not yet believed. Help us to preach your gospel to them whenever we have the opportunity. We ask you to show mercy to the many people in our world who due to being downhearted, ashamed, afraid, having a psychological disorder, or for other reasons are considering suicide. Preserve your gift of life to them, this time of grace. Use us to help them as we are able or point them to professionals who are better equipped to do so. We ask you to show special mercy on Christians who are in this situation. Let them hear your good news, know that it is for them personally, and be preserved in faith by you. We ask you to look with kindness on those mourning the loss of a loved one through suicide. Use us to stay with them, help them and support them, talk with them and preach your powerful Word to them so they too can take refuge in you. Help us resist the temptation to change your teachings to make our conversations a little more comfortable. Instead make us believe more firmly what you have done, your plan, and your will. Finally, when we ourselves also think of the fact that we will die, give us the comfort that you have taken away our sin and so taken away the sting of death. Let us die in faith, confident that you will take us to be with you forever! Your will be done. Amen.
Theology Q&A
Over the years, our professors have been asked many questions in the classroom. Much of the time these questions repeat or have a similar theme. This is because they are important and are on the hearts and minds of our students who truly desire to serve God’s people well and share his truth with the lost. “Theology Q&A” is a response to those questions. Each month a question will be posted with an answer by an ALS faculty member. The answers are not meant to be a full theological/doctrinal treatment of the matter, but rather a pastoral answer that seeks to allow the person asking the question to speak the truth in love to the person in need in the most appropriate way possible. We pray this resource is a blessing to you and those you serve. God bless!